Two Becomes One

Deal Breaker: The Know It All

Posted on October 15, 2009 by Two Becomes One

The Know It All

Is there someone in your life that just constantly has a comment for everything? When you post something celebratory online, is this the first person to chime in with a laundry list of everything that can and will go wrong- or worse, is this someone you are in a romantic relationship with? Are you sitting there, perhaps finger on your own “comment” button, contemplating what you think is a well informed reply? The internet seems to have given people free reign to advise without being invited to do so- and this is not a favorable sort of interaction. The Know It All is not someone who is a take charge, assertive person that looks great to a prospective date- it’s just annoying.

Are You The Know It All?

A few things that may indicate that you are in fact an internet know it all- do you find yourself responding to posts where no advice is needed, but giving it, anyway? These are posts either just venting, or emails where someone is just thinking about a situation and you’re only response is either a litany of reasons this is wrong or some sort of advice. Here’s a hint- if the post, email or message does not ask for advice or say things such as, “I’m confused”- then just don’t. If you look back over the course of your conversations with a person and find that more often than not your comments are a bunch of well meaning advice- the person on the receiving end is probably not all that appreciative. Most may not even know how to tell you that you’re coming across in a manner that is just annoying and not all that helpful or perhaps they are wondering just how stupid you think they are. Either way, this is not the way to make a good impression. Stick to giving advice when it is asked for, specifically.

Dealing With a Know It All

Do you cringe when you see their online handle come up? You thought maybe this was the sort of problem solving, assertive person you’d like to date but since, you’ve started to wonder if they didn’t have some sort of fetish with acting like your parent. Everyone’s found themselves in this position with someone, at some point and there really is only a couple of things you can do- if this is someone you do care about, ignore it for the most part, but maybe mention sometimes that you “aren’t looking for advice”. Cut them off at the pass. If this person just gets out of line, however, a more stern, direct approach may be needed. After all, if they are going to be giving unsolicited advice, they’d probably better get used to getting it, too, right?
Let your unsolicited advice be on how NOT to completely put you off by constantly playing the parent role.

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