Two Becomes One

Manners Via IM

Posted on October 15, 2009 by Two Becomes One

Instant Message Etiquette

You’ve been messaging eachother back and forth on the dating site for a bit now, and you may be considering adding that e-sweetie to your real instant messenger service. This is actually a bigger step than it seems, because often, when things go real time- that is, off the dating site’s IM service, this is where the true test of the connection you believe may be there happens. Being able to converse real time and pretty much whenever you are online is a great way to either get to know eachother much better, or realize you’ve got the wrong idea about someone.

When To IM

This is the first thing- making sure that you’re at a point when it is appropriate to either ask for IM information or give yours out. If you have been getting one word replies to your messages or perhaps not even replies to all of them- you may want to hold off on asking. However, if things have been going along smoothly, then there’s no harm in taking it off site- just be sure you really are prepared to have this person contacting you every time you are online. Asking about off site IMs is okay, really, but if you’re told that the other person isn’t ready for that- do not argue it, do not ask why. You aren’t really in a position to require that information of anyone, just yet and everyone’s got different ways of doing things that make them feel comfortable.

Initial IM Tips

Unless you have already been talking about more risqué topics, or flirting in that manner, don’t, guys. Hitting a woman up with incessant innuendos and very little in the way of real conversation just makes you look like a creepy pervert, so don’t do it. IMing doesn’t really have to be some contrived thing, but try to be a bit polite about things- you never know who is standing with your online sweetie on the other end of the screen, so make sure you aren’t putting her in an awkward position. IM conversations can be pretty much like any other conversation, just relax and have a good time- but try to mind your manners a bit from the outset. Being able to get to know one another is the point- and if you come across in a way that is a bit over the top or overbearing you may just find yourself blocked.

Being able to converse real time via IMs is a wonderful communication tool and can help you to get closer than simply sending emails and messages, so, it’s something to consider when you’re looking around the online dating world. Not only consider what you would say, but the timing of such so that you are still yet making the best impression. Talking to one another int his way usually leads to phone conversations if done right and from there, potentially a date, so, put your best IM forward and have a great time.

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