Two Becomes One

Yo-Yo Dating

Posted on October 15, 2009 by Two Becomes One

They’re Just Irresistible, or Available?

Now, I know what you’re thinking. Often when we speak of yo yo relationships we are talking about a “she/he’s not that into you” situation- but not in this one. In this one we are going to talk about another phenomenon in relationships that we like to call The Comeback Kid or, Why Your Mom Thinks You’re a Sucker. You get fed up with the behaviors. Maybe it’s going out all hours, maybe it’s internet porn, or maybe he or she is just not pulling their weight- whatever. It’s a long standing thing that causes big fights, things get heated and either you break it off, or you both sulk it out a while. Either way- the problem never gets resolved. I’ve got a secret for you, I’m afraid- if you said you were going to end it, you probably should have. Wonder why the habit is still there and things are the way they still are?
Because your partner got away with it. Say what you will, but for all your fighting, screaming and complaining- you’re still there.

Figure This One Out

Do you really fear losing this loser or are you at a loss for what to do if you are all alone? If you cannot really answer that, or you answered “don’t want to be alone”- take a step back. If you’re miserable alone, but you’re picking up the slack or dealing with second rate loving from someone, really, either way you’re miserable. But the problem comes in when you’re miserable and with someone- one of two things usually happens. There’s either a cheating, or there’s just you, feeling like the weight of the world is on your shoulders and you’ve got no recourse.

But you do.

Now, if you’re alone and miserable, you have a chance of being open to a real partner. That would be the first thing that needs to be pointed out. No matter how you may feel it, no, chances are good you won’t be alone forever. However, if you feel you absolutely must give the Repeat Offender one last chance- make sure you mean it. If you want to see changes, stick to it. If you slip, and throw your hands up even one time? Again, you’ve given in. Sure, compromise is a good thing but not with the Repeat Offender. If they are constantly singing the “I can change!” tune and you never see the changes manifest- chances are you never will. The occasional longshot happens, but that is very, very rare without some serious putting down of the foot- so do yourself a favor and stand up for yourself. The worst that could happen is you could end up moving on and one day finding someone who does make you happy. The best?

Just maybe “I can change” won’t be a lie this time.

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